1/16/2005

Alg.

*So it was a long day, and now it's really tomorrow. So I lose; no high score table for me.

*The new "Entertainment Weekly" had a review of the recent "Elektra" motion picture. It got a 'D+'. I'll spare you the gory details. As unplanned balance, though, the new Archer Prewitt album got an 'A-'. Prewitt is the mastermind behind the lovely "Sof' Boy" series of comical books, but I think the music takes up a wee bit more of his time, since "Sof' Boy" has only seen three issues since 1998 or thereabouts. Good, colorful, funny stuff though; check them out!

*I was in one of those bars tonight. The sort of small place in a small town where the walls look to be closing in, all while dotted with the heads of several types of deer. I couldn't tell them apart, but I knew every one was special. At least half the room was underage; there were gaggles of teen girls hanging around, not one a day over nineteen, some of them maybe high school seniors. Not that it mattered. I stood around with my group of people, drinking Jim Beam and staring at the deer heads, who seemed to be looking at me after a few drinks. I tried to think of nice things to take my mind off of the environment. I tried to think of nice things in comics. You know what I like?

The letters pages in the back of early Image comics. The worse the book the better.

They're all of these brightly enthusiastic young kids. Or at least they sound like young kids. I was a young kid back when I read that stuff, and I sort of wish I'd have bothered to write a letter. And no matter how awful the book seems today, filtered through the lens of age, there's always some wildly, screamingly, delightfully enthusiastic letters to please every bargain bin historian who happens to cruise on through. A lot of these letters sound the same; they're largely like:

Dear Team Knight,

Wow! Issue one of 'KnightStroke' had really blown my mind with its awesome action, and issue two had me biting my nails down to bleeding nubs it was so thrilling, but issue three gave me an all new high, since I actually crapped my pants in excitement! I literally dropped a giant log of crap right in my pants in the middle of the comics store while I read the new issue, right at the part where Shrapnel finally had his chance to face off with the evil RaptureTech! I guess I just lost control! People started to leave the shop and avoided looking me in the eye, but I was too busy turning each page, my palms sweating with anticipation to see the victor of this battle between these awesome characters! I've never seen such detailed art from Marvel; you blow them all away! By the time I reached the HUGE cliffhanger ending the smell had gotten as intense as the action and my shopkeeper was pretty mad and he dragged me outside and started punching me in the face over and over in the back room! Blow after excruciating blow mashed my face for twenty solid minutes until it was nothing more than hamburger but all I could think about was if HighSight and BluddSlash could possibly escape the trap of NanoCorp! The inking was really good too. Can't wait for issue four - get here soon cause I can't wait!

Your fan,
Todd

It was these thoughts that kept me sane as I stared at "Mad TV" on the wall, the actors pantomiming their way through a VH1 parody, unaware of the station's status as a parody of itself. I drank again, and the heads of the deers stared ahead, into the smoke and the teenage abandon, and me here overage and not a card flashed nor a sweatdrop dripped.

But it's quarter comics that keep me sane, and that's a sign of unique madness if such a thing as ever been real.