8/11/2006

I can't move.

*I'm too tired for anything right now. It's fortunate I have these interns to type out everything I dictate.

I must be worn out from all the excitement of earlier today, when I met up with gentleman and scholar Chris Mautner for lunch, and encountered a race against time within the parking garage I'd left my vehicle at. I'm kind of used to getting a ticket when parking, then giving the ticket and a fee to the person in the booth while I'm driving out. Easy, right? Well this booth gave me a ticket when I drove in, then made me feed the ticket into a machine at the door after I was ready to leave, but before I actually reached my car. I had to feed dollar bills into the machine, which then spat my ticket back out, all marked up, with this message displayed on the screen:

"YOUR TICKET WILL BE VALID TO EXIT THE BUILDING FOR TEN MINUTES"

I mean, holy shit - a race against time! I could have used a few sirens and flashing red lights going off just for spice, but it's a good thing I remembered where I parked the car. I've spent more than ten minutes searching around before. Anyway, I found the car, and got to the exit, and fed the ticket into yet another machine, which let me out and told me to have a nice day. What if I was late? Would robots pop out of the walls and lift my car back over to its spot, and make me pay again? Would it just tell me to have a terrible day? Would I get displayed on a big screen in the lobby for everyone to laugh at?

Truly, modern life is like a video game.